Lately people have been discussing whom Obama will pick as his running mate. One thing is certain: with the Democrats' Senate majority so thin, no way will Obama pick a sitting senator. Do the math. So who does that leave?
The Short List
pros - military dood helps neutralize the 'security gap.'
cons - creepy smile on tv, won't necessary deliver a state
pros - actual San Francisco liberal makes Obama look mainstream
cons - actual San Francisco liberal makes Obama look mainstream
pros - Nobel laureate, Oscar™, years of experience
cons - difficult to convince to run for thankless job
pros - beloved Clinton era figure whose initials aren't HRC
cons - born in Prague. Crypto Jew. Almost as old as McCain
pros - neutralizes gender gap, might carry Texas
cons - died two years ago
pros - decades of experience, Korean War Hero neutralizes McCain advantage
cons - two black guys on one ticket?
pros - voted against Iraq war, voted to impeach Cheney
cons - gaii
Now that I have exhausted all the options, I am ready to announce the winner. Your next vice president will be:
Kansas Governor Kathleen Sebelius!!
She will completely neutralize the disgruntled Hillary Clinton voting bloc! Time Magazine named her one of the top 5 governors! She's a Catholic from the middle of the country! I, for one, welcome our new Sebelian overlordess!